I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
