how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
