we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
