Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
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