I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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