I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
the night ended with taco bell and tears
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
