i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
