We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize
