Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
do herpes really smell.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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