he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize