using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
