I wish I could teleport
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
