marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
