i barfeds in our rink
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
