I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
