was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
