I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
