I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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