help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I need moral support for this bender
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
