Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
