"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
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