Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
