I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
