just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
