you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize