But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
