i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Randomize
