If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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