doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
