He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
