hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I smell like Dick and happiness
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