did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize
