margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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