My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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