Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Randomize
