I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
