I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
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