Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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