I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
