ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
