hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
