remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
