just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
