So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
