I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
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