I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
