id be glad to
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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