Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
