i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
