Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize
